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A Knife In My Heart
Wednesday. 7.14.04 3:15 am
watching: A Black Screen
listening to: Funeral For A Friend
mood: Lost and Lonely

To all my t3h friends and other random people that are bored surfing the internet at this very minute:

WHAT IS UP?!?!?!

Well, there isn't too much to say that would be worth reading, but here goes...

I finally am free of my mother. However, this freedom, as with all other freedoms, came with a price. I now live with my dad in a one bedroom apartment... I am not even supposed to be living there. Thus ends my privacy that I had with my own room before. We are a little cramped - my sister occasionally visits - but, hey, it beats living with a mother who's gone crazy. Now i've seen crazy, but when moms go crazy, it tops all. I only await for the television show to spawn... Dun dun dun... "When Madres Attack!" (also available in espanol). For all of you who don't know, my parents are spliting up, mainly due to the fact that my father has realized that my mom is about to be the Star of the above show. Hopefully though i'll be back in the house soon until my dad gets his own house. I mean come on, does it really make sense for 2 bachelors and my sister to live in a one bedroom apartment while my mom has a 4 bedroom house to herself? I think not, but then again I have a lot of growing up to do as well.

Work - (73h 5uX50Rz) I tend to take many a day off during each week... I'll give you only one guess why that is. Okay, good enough of an answer, you were most likely right anyways. So, I go to work today for the first time in about a week and a half today. WTF happened mate? I only see one person I know that worked there and I barely talk to her (she's like 45). Work is full of all new people, it was quite strange. I felt, well, lost, as if I went to the wrong place... was I dreaming? NOPE! Oh well, I dealt with it and just kept thinking, "Oh man, only this long until I get to stop thinking about shooting every customer," obviously it worked out alright as I am not in jail and restrained myself. I saw sexy Peter and Ashley today (HAPPY BIRTHDAY ASH!), that was cool, although I did not get to talk to them long unfortunately. With this new force of people at Randall's came a new manager... who was watching my every move. Finally I get to a break right, no one is in my line, I lean back for a minute I hope of rest when out of nowhere I hear, "Trevor, you look too relaxed..." Well wtf do you expect me to do when there's no one in my line and I've been scanning/sacking/taking crap from customers for about 3 hours straight? I'll tell you, I'm going to freaking lean back for a minute if I want dammit! -- Jess never works with me anymore... i'm sad :(

My carzorz - Krista, yes I gave my baby a name. Please comment and tell me if you like it. Krista has been sick lately, her gears are sticking, she needs new shoes (tires), and makes a ticking noise (is it her time of the month?). I need money to take her to the hospital, Please... Please kind sir or madame... would you let a poor girl in need of medicine die? For donations please contact my secretary: AIM - V45HTheStampede (and yes he is armed and deadly so the rumors go, the 60 Billion Double Dollar Man -- Ohhhh, he's so sexy though.)

Music - My future career I hope. New Funeral For A Friend came out today!!! A very good buy indeed. I've been listening to Across Five Aprils a lot lately, they have the best lyrics, my Subject is a line from them. If anyone wants a copy of their cd, let me know.

Well, other than that I've kind of just been chilling, hanging out, playing PC, watching shiat on tv and stuff... nothing exciting... you people and your adventurous lives... I envy you.

Well, I love you all... I guess, except you <-- Just kidding. For a special someone - I HEART YOU !!! You know who that be! Cya!

And now for Across Five Aprils - "Je' Mennuie De Vous" (I have experienced this very song in reality)

Am I wasting my time with these feelings?
The pressure's off now so I'm back on the ground.
Too bad, I kind of liked it in the clouds with you.
Because you take me away from everything and everyone,
that's held me back for so long.
Heaven for a few days, makes up for all the hell that life's dealt me,
even now that's gone.
It seems he's got your attention now, lucky guy.
But isn't that the way it always ends?
It seems he's got your attention just like you got mine.
I'll express my feelings, then sit back and watch you walk away.
You're beautiful in every way to me.

- Later People -

-The TreV (Leave me the notezors aka comments!)

Comment! (4) | Recommend!

Updationazorexzors?
Tuesday. 6.8.04 3:22 am
Hey all,

Well, guess it was time for me to update I see. So enjoy!

I haven't been up to much lately, just hanging out with Steveo, Jerm, and Kir Kir. I've got to get out and start looking for another job. My job sucks so bad, yeah, too bad I didn't get the buzz on how much grocery stores suck when I applied to Randall's (thanks jess haha). Never go to Randall's, you don't know what lies underneath it's curtain, it is an evil corporation and almost every customer is an A-Hole.

Did anyone ever tell you when you first started driving that you'll get tired of it? I heard this non-stop during my learning of the road; I in fact thought I'd get tired of it. Yet I still love it! Cruising around is fun, I enjoy it very much, especially listening to music while doing it. I wish I could do it more, however gas is getting to be a biotch. The price of living is going up... we should all get more money (extra for me sshhh) yet we won't. Therefore to get more money I must work more and like the most of you, I hate working. Oh well.

Music is taking hold of my life. It is becoming more clearer now than ever to me. It is my escape of all that is corrupt and unholy in the world. Do you ever notice that there seems to be more wrong than right surrounding you? Yet as a whole, the world is full of good. I plan on going to Full Sail next year and study the Recording Arts. I'm sure I'll have a lot of fun with that. I'm not worried about money in my life. I have faith that God will give me what I need and that is all. I believe that this career may not have the highest paying jobs, even though some fields do, yet they pay enough. As long as I'm happy, then why should I ask for more? What is happiness to you?

There's much more that I can go on and ramble about, yet I am too tired to think of it. I hope that everyone's enjoyed their summer so far, yes? Okay, that's good then. Well, GN everyone, byi!

-73|-| 7R3/5

Keep dreaming...

Comment! (8) | Recommend!

The Beginning
Friday. 6.4.04 1:57 pm
Hello, Not much has really happened so far this summer. Just me spending money whilst trying to save in the process (the results of this ratio aren't looking too good for the Trevz). Money sucks; it causes way too many unnecessary problems in life. I hope summer has been good so far for everyone. Well, I'm just going to go back to doing my laundry now, later guys.

Comment! (13) | Recommend!

Underoath
Can you feel your heart beat erasing, can you taste the fear in her sweat? You've done this wrong it's too far gone, the sheets tell of regret. I admit that I'm just a fool for you, i am just a fool for you.
Atreyu - Bleeding Mascara
Look how pretty she is when she falls down. And there's no beauty in bleeding mascara. Lips are quivering like a withering rose, she's back again.
Radiohead - Motion Picture Soundtrack
Red wine and sleeping pills. Help me get back to your arms. Cheap sex and sad films. Help me get back where I belong. I think you’re crazy, maybe. I think you’re crazy, maybe. Stop sending letters, Letters always get burned It’s not like the movies. They fed us on little white lies. I think you’re crazy, maybe. I think you’re crazy, maybe. I will see you in the next life.
Chut
Up!

"Regret is a burden that I'll carry from here to my grave."

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